Friday, October 14, 2011

Fool Me Once, Shame on You. Fool Me Twice...

We are now at fool me three times.  I suppose we should be full of shame.  I certainly feel foolish, used, betrayed.  My beautiful 15 year old daughter fooled me three times.  Trust is so far gone that I'm not sure how we will ever get it back.  Today I was served with a court summons.  Delinquent.  It's sobering to see that word applied to your child.  I look at her beautiful face and wonder how such a word can possibly describe her.

Earlier in the summer my daughter got caught sneaking back into a friends house after going to a party with her boyfriend and drinking.  We discovered that the sneaking around and drinking were an ongoing habit.  Lovely.  My daughter spent the remainder of the summer under my direct supervision.   Sleepovers are no longer part of her world.  Parental supervision when visiting with her friends is a requirement.

Two weeks ago, we allowed my daughter to go with her boyfriend and another couple to their school's homecoming.  It was the first time we'd allowed her to go anywhere without direct parental supervision since last June.  It was the first time we'd allowed her to ride in the car with a teenage driver.  After the couples left for the dance, we discovered (thanks to some text messages) that vodka was part of the plan.  We had no confidence that the kids would remain at the dance, despite what they'd told us or the limits that we'd placed on them.  My husband went to the dance to confront our daughter.  Unfortunately, our hopes of keeping our concerns quiet was impossible when the school officials and sheriff got involved.  All four of the kids involved were charged with underage drinking.

Today, my doorbell rang and I was greeted by a sheriff with a court summons. We had a nice chat.  He liked my tattoo.  Evidently, several families in town received a similar summons today.  Homecoming was a busy night for the sheriff's department evidently.   In twelve days we go to court.  We'll probably see several people we know there.  My daughter will be pleading guilty.  She is.  No doubt.  I have no idea what the consequences will be nor the cost.  She'll pay them all.  Hopefully it will be a lesson learned, a lasting lesson.

Maybe I've learned something in all of this too.  Perhaps, I won't be fooled again.

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