Sunday, June 24, 2012

Moments Like This

Today on the way to church, I had one of those moments when the curtains are drawn back and everything becomes crystal clear.   In an instant, I found myself, for just an instant, able to see how divorce seems like an option.  My moment occurred when, on the way to church this morning, my beloved husband uttered the words, "Your van smells like cat piss."

For me, the comment about the smell of my van was a source of irritation.  I had to take a deep breath and then say a quick prayer that the Lord would help me find something to be thankful about in this situation. 

I was able to list:
I never have to worry about not being able to recognize a gas leak as long as my husband is around with his super-sensitive smeller
My stuffed up nose was a blessing if the car truly did have that odor
No one else was complaining or gagging
My well-used van was running and able to take us to church even if the odor wasn't desirable
The windows worked and the day was beautiful for a breezy ride to church
My super-sensitive smeller husband was going to church with me in my stinky van

Admittedly, the last one was a bit hard to come to.  And in that moment, the moment where I had to stop and search for gratitude for the man that I married, I realized that THIS is how divorce happens.

In my life, comment about the smell of my van, while momentarily irritating is, over a relatively short time, buried under positive interactions.  Those interactions happen with my husband, with my children, with the world around us.  I don't really have time to dwell on the smell because there is too much rapid fire good coming down the road.  But, if I didn't have all that good, it would be all too easy to dwell on the smell.

I am so thankful that my husband is loving.  I am thankful that his positive comments outweigh his negative comments.  I am thankful that I'm able to put the irritating comments into perspective and move on.  I'm also thankful that for just a moment I got a clear vision  of how important my reactions are in shaping my world. 

Please, don't misunderstand, I'm not saying that with a little positive thinking all relationship problems can be solved.  This morning, my choice to be thankful created a day for which I could easily be thankful.  I am thankful that, more often than not, the choice is mine.  I am thankful for the moments like this that remind me how important it is to be grateful for all good and to think on these things.

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